To be honest passive sitting has never bothered anyone. No one has come up to me and said ‘I’m sorry, but you sitting there is putting us off our dinners. Although I would like to think I could put anyone off their dinners just by sitting in their vicinity – I would do it all the time.
Despite my facetiousness, I know where they’re coming from. Sitting down all night in front of the gogglebox is not healthy. But when people are tired, they rest. And if they have jobs that keep them on their feet for 8 hours a day they’re too knackered to go for a run or a bike ride.
This is yet another case of some idiot with too much time on their hands telling people they shouldn’t be sitting on their arses. Because they’ve suddenly seen the error in their ways and want everyone to be equally enlightened.
But consider the alternative, if we were to give up sitting, when would we rest? Bedtime? There is nothing like getting to the end of your daily tasks and have a bit of a sit down in front of the telly for an hour or two. It’s the reward at the end of the task. Something to look forward to.
It’s called de-stressing. Winding down. Relaxing. You know all that stuff that the people who come up with stupid slogans like ‘sitting is the new smoking’ do all the time. Being on your feet all day and then stressing yourself about what you should be doing isn’t good for you either.
We are surrounded by hypocrites. ‘Do as I say not as I do’ people. They may mean well but I bet they don’t work a stressful day. Travel on a packed tube. Make dinner wash up and then go out for a run at midnight. That’s how heart attacks happen.
‘You should also eat at least 5 pieces of fruit and vegetable a day. More if you can. When do you do this? As you are walking around the living room because you daren’t sit down?
In places of work they now encourage ‘stand up meetings’ because they are better for you. One question: people in wheelchairs? Are they now to be pilloried for their refusal to join in a ‘stand-up meeting’.
Will people usher them from restaurants because sitting is the new smoking? Made to sit outside pubs?
Of course I am being stupid. But no more stupid than the ‘arse-wipe’ who came up with ‘sitting is the new smoking’ statement.
I would like to get all these ‘well-meaning’ idiots and hold them to their statements. When they try to sit down I will shout at them ‘sitting is the new smoking’. When they open a bag of crisps I will shout ‘fried food is metabolic poison’.
When they order a chocolate dessert in a restaurant I will shout ‘fruit makes a better dessert and contributes to your 5-a-day’.
Leave people alone. They’ve had enough of all this ‘health talk’. Let them smoke. Let them drink. Let them enjoy their lives without butting in and being a killjoy. It’s their lives. let them live and die how they want to.
As the late great Bill Hicks once said. “Non-smokers die every day.” Same goes for non-sitters.